Friday, January 23, 2009

And A Smarmy Cougar Victim Shall Lead Them

The title pretty much says it all about my view of this vacuous piece of self-promotion that Ashton Kutcher has placed on the Huffington Post a few days ago trying, I think, to encourage some groundswell of volunteerism during this political transition.

Ok, you know what? I DO NOT CARE ONE IOTA WHAT A HOLLYWOOD STAR THINKS THAT I SHOULD DO TO AFFIRM MY VIEWS OF COMMUNITY, SACRIFICE, VOLUNTARISM, AND HOPE (in case you were wondering, that was me, after too many beers, and the bartender is looking at me thinking he may need to call my wife or throw me out, or both frankly. But I've been tipping him pretty well over the years, and the bar is fairly empty..........and it's not a hip bar either, so he let's it slide once I lower my voice).

But really, catch the stuff that "moved" Ashton to set-up a friggin MySpace page (yes, that is the extent of his "sacrifice") to encourage self-absorbed people to feel better about themselves:
Barack Obama stood in front of a room of Los Angeles liberals and told us that everyone could have the American dream... but we were going to have to work for it. He said that every kid will get assistance for college but they were going to have to work for it. He explained that our nation could become independent of foreign oil but that we were going to have to give up a bit of our current comfortable existence. Now, from the mouth of an average straight-shooting American that may not sound audacious at all, but for a politician seeking endorsements to tell people that they are going to have to make sacrifices for the greater good, that he is not going to wave his magic legislative wand and fix it, that's audacity. That audacity is what gave me hope.
Ashton, dude, I hate to break it to you, but politicians TALK about sacrifice all the time. What we hear is "ask someone else to sacrifice" not "I'm going to have to sacrifice." What you heard, my friend was "hey, I'm loaded, I'll buy a Prius to go with my Lambo and drive it like once a month to premires and such and send the right signal to the little people about saving gas." When a person has no idea what they spend in a given month on gasoline or shoes or sushi, how can they even begin to understand what the word sacrifice really means?

The magical message Obama gave the Hollywood folks of sacrifice, trade-offs, and working to get somewhere in life is pretty much what I hear at church every Sunday. It's what a lot of normal people here in the Midwest think every day when they face friends who've lost jobs, or sons and daughters who can't afford college, or family members who can't get healthcare. It's not sugarcoated with the protection of millions of dollars in wealth and a self-inflated sense of self-worth.

So what public expression of solidarity did Ashton and Le Cougar produce after this moving, life changing experience listening to Obama? Ashton and his Highlander of a wife/girlfriend went and produced one of the creepiest videos I have ever seen in my life in which a collection of hip, Hollywood types pledge allegiance NOT to the United States, NOT to the government, NOT to the "the President" but instead personally to Barack Obama. Skip to 3:54 of the video and gaze upon the creation of the latest American personality cult......oh great.

Ashton, if you think that after never finishing college and then going onto fame and fortune doing underwear ads and following a cult (which is Madonna's faith of choice) gives you some special insights or deep responsibility to be a role model and tell people to worship our new president, stop sniffing the glue. While we are all impressed with those four Kids Choice Awards you have won for your "artistry" we are doing fine without your help.

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